Repeat the Sounding Joy

New

2011-09-16T09:59:00.000-04:00

It's nearly fall according to the calendar and my heater kicking in this morning reiterates that we're on the cusp. I could hardly believe it when I realized it's been a year since last autumn when I tried to read Dracula and gave up as Christmas rolled around and vampires were less seasonally stimulating. This year has flown by! But there is something about fall that feels fresh and new and gives me energy for what's to come (whatever that may be). I've always loved the line in "You've Got Mail" where one of the main characters says he wants to buy a "bouquet" of pencils. That's just how I feel. Fall is a beginning. First it was because I was in school I suppose and now it's because I'm married to a teacher, but I think I measure years starting in September. As the world prepares to sleep for the cold winter months there's something paradoxically lively about it.

Let us, then, be up and doing,
With a heart for any fate ;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor and to wait.

"A Psalm of Life" final stanza -H.W. Longfellow

Ethical Industries # 5

2011-08-11T08:38:00.000-04:00

Going green is hip, recycling is sexy, and "caring" is popular. I've been highlighting several industries that came about as instigators or results of this current ideology. Marketers have (of course) embraced these popular ideas. But it never hurts to remember that buried below all the shiny packaging (metaphorical or otherwise) lies a true need and a real way to "be the change." By the rules of capitalism, buying has power. Many of us seek to reduce our purchases, live simply and with less, but when you purchase, purchase well and wisely. Show your power.

Cost effective enough for the masses, many coffee and chocolate companies seek to be known for their fair trade or rain forest protection practices. A few of these worthy companies are:

Caribou Coffee

Larabar

Grounds for Change (coffee, chocolate, and some tea as well)

Endangered Species Chocolate (this one is really fun; learn about the animals directly helped by your purchase -my favorite: Black Panther; the most clever? "Bug Bites")

Intelligentsia Coffee

There really are so many great options. For more, see the Fair Trade Website

The 99 cents chair

2011-08-03T22:53:00.000-04:00

I'm tackling another re-upholstering project -my first that has an upholstered back.
So far I've managed (with the help of my rugged husband) to remove some very pesky screws and some rather ubiquitous industrial-strength staples. I'm very pleased to reaffirm that, despite its obstinate nature, the chair is in fact rather well made and assuredly of good strong solid wood.
Here are some of the demolition pictures.

Ethical Industries #4

2011-07-25T10:18:00.000-04:00

My most recent find came about quite unexpectedly. My husband and I were taking an evening stroll around our town and came across a store front with the words WAR boldly inscribed across it. At first I just thought it was an odd choice of words for a boutique in a fairly upscale neighborhood, but then I realized that it was an acronym. I immediately made a mental note and looked it up upon arriving home. The WAR Boutique is actually a storefront for an organization of much larger scope: Women At Risk, International. The targeted benefit group is of course women, particularly those at risk in abusive or trafficking situations. According to their own missions statement, "Women At Risk, International unites and educates women to create circles of protection and hope around women at risk through culturally sensitive, value-added intervention projects."

I hope to see this organization grow in the future with more funds available for its worthy endeavors.
The best thing about WAR International is that they understand the women they serve in a holistic manner. That is to say, they desire to serve and rescue these women spiritually as well as physically. I cannot put it better than they have themselves:
"The message we take women everywhere is that our value is in Christ and walking with dignity with our God. He is with us through the furnace and makes us precious. Our hope is that we will leave this veil of tears and walk streets of gold beside the one who rescued, redeemed, cleansed, and empowered us as his daughters."

Ethical Industries #3

2011-07-20T09:52:00.000-04:00

I've got a double whammy for you today, two birds with one stone if you will. Not only is the following company committed to fair trade, but they frequently have products available made from recycled materials as well. According to their vision statement "Ten Thousand Villages creates opportunities for artisans around the globe to earn a fair wage" while they are committed to social responsibility. The stores themselves are volunteer run and feature products from around the world, Argentina to Zaire.
There are stores around the country and of course you can always order online.

Ethical Industries #2

2011-07-10T22:39:00.000-04:00

I am thankful people have begun to understand that as a globalized society our actions have a great impact not only on those who live near and with us, but on those who live around the globe. One of the main ways we have global impact is through purchases -thank capitalism for that. When we purchase we support the suppliers of a given product (the good and the bad, unfortunately).

What and how we purchase bears direct correlation to our ethics. Wendell Berry stated that "eating is practical theology because it gives us a chance to honor God with our bodies." Similarly, buying is practical theology because it gives a chance to honor God with our money (in addition to other stewardship tools like tithing and giving, of course). It is not only through what we buy but how we buy that we can honor God. We must consider where we purchase our goods from. With capitalism comes the responsibility of the buyer. We have power, and as anyone who's seen Spiderman knows, that is accompanied by responsibility. Sometimes these goods can be more expensive as a result of ethical practices (a living wage given to factory workers for example). As Christians, I believe it is right to say if it helps people, spend a little more.

Check out Everyday Justice for a bit more on this topic. Julie Clawson takes a very practical approach, understanding that few if any of us are in a position to purge our closets and fill them with ethically sourced items.

And in the mean time, here's another ethical way to purchase things. In association with National Geographic, Novica is a company that works in partnership with artisans worldwide to provide the with a viable income. Right now they've got a sale on hammocks and other Mexican items going on! You can also occasionally find Novica items on Overstock.com.

"Art for Everyone"

2011-06-24T10:20:00.000-04:00

While this site takes a little bit of the fun out of the hunt for a spectacular piece of art in the estate sales of the world, or the overpowering delight that swells above any lingering guilt when you do splurge on a piece you "just love!" it is still a fun idea. While you won't find originals on Affordable Art you will find honest to goodness prints, and those count. It helps people to realize that sometimes, you don't have to slap posters -those archaic remnants from your first college decorating attempts - on the wall and call it day. You can aspire to more. You can have art.

Ethical Industries

2011-06-21T23:41:00.000-04:00

Lots could be said on this topic, and I'm thinking about trying to run something along this vein from time to time, hopefully with some regularity. I always love companies that encourage long-lasting self sufficiency. Of course a hand out or a hand up are necessary at times, but these sorts of things - the individual craftsman industries - are what are more helpful and will keep individuals and families employed over a lifetime.
I ran across this website and was delighted to find not only beautiful textiles, but a good cause as well. Check out 'Creative Women' for some authentic ethnic textiles. Even Anthropologie is on board.

3D!

2011-06-17T23:19:00.000-04:00

I found the coolest website. Using it, you can create, decorate, and view 3D images of interiors and gardens. I think there may be some version that is more detailed than the one I've shown here (including scenes outside your windows and doorways), but looking at other people's images and abilities is really great too. Check it out at mydeco.com.

Art for the people

2011-06-16T13:59:00.000-04:00

Well, maybe the title of this post is a little bit of a misnomer. I hope I didn't conjure up in you images of artists struggling with numb fingers to scratch out a living from beautiful images created from minuscule supplies in some by-gone impoverished European hamlet.
What I am really excited about is this: Makoto Fujimura (one of my modern art "exceptions") has provided, while not his famous works or perhaps his best, images available to the public. Since these images are donations, they are not subject to the same gallery-imposed restrictions as his finer pieces. Essentially, free beauty. What's not to like about that? See more images here.

Design Blogs

2011-06-14T15:03:00.002-04:00

I would learn Swedish just to move to this neighborhood:

http://www.stadshem.se/Object.aspx?gid=OBJ24162_1116671007

Living

2011-06-11T11:07:00.001-04:00

I've been trying to figure out how to make our apartment look fabulous. On a budget of, say... $0, it was kind of tricky. So I decided instead to bring all the accents of a particular color that I had into the living room and give it more interest. When I snapped some photos and stepped back I wasn't disappointed. It's not perfect, but for apartment living, I feel like I'm getting somewhere. I did buy candles; I set one on an antique teacup saucer and the other on a large coaster.

Break down of some of the things you see -
- Couch -futon sleeper from Sam's Club (got this when I moved in)
- Afghan -I knit
- Bookcases -Billy from Ikea
- Coffee tables -FREE from our neighbors! -mantle was a gift from the m too!
- Folding chair - hand-me-down from my great aunt (I have another arm chair that's awaiting upholstery; it was purchased for a whopping 99 cents at Goodwill)
- Tan pillow covers -Ikea
- Blue pillow - Target
- Mid-century Modern Lamp -craigslist purchase
- Art work - honeymoon purchase, birthday present, hand printed card, & original watercolor art walk.
- Purple end table - my tea party table as a kid refinished with an eggplant paint.
- Shoe bin under table - Korean ammo box found on the beach at Pusan, South Korea.

making music

2011-06-10T22:36:00.000-04:00

My cousin (one of the many awesome ones I am privileged to have) showed me this really diverting link. Though not inspired by Google's latest Les Paul guitar legend tribute it is another fun make your own music tool Only with this one you can't record it (and after a few minutes of fun unless you change notes around you get got in a web of monotony).
Give it a try HERE.

2011-05-27T11:07:00.000-04:00

For a while I was collecting images on weheartit.com, but I was so discouraged with the off color and trashy images that seemed to frequent the home page and also I found the lack of organization frustrating. Now I've found pinterest and I love it. It's so fun to look around and see what beautiful images other people are finding! Bonus - they have a no nudity policy.
Here's an image I recently found that I "pinned" to one of my boards:

Happy Mother's Day

2011-05-06T21:34:00.001-04:00

One of the perks of my job is that I get to design the bulletins for any special occasions. Here's the Mother's day one I did using a drawing I made from an old Art Nouveau advertisement.

P.S. Happy Mother's Day Mom A & Mom B!

Letters, the art

2011-04-20T22:56:00.003-04:00

Sappho of Pompeii

People are relational and as soon as they expanded beyond their place of birth and ceased to be nomadic tribes wandering through life they began corresponding. Some of the earliest recorded documents that tell us of ages past are letters. Letters reveal something uniquely personal (some argue that historical letters ought to be left to the dust because of a sacredness in this soul-exposing medium). Through the ages, fathers write to sons, husbands to wives, sisters to sisters, lovers to lovers. Even in professional correspondence, people still desire to relate a certain aspect of themselves -their thoughts and opinions - through their written word to their particular audience. But since the Bloom12 goal is personal correspondence, I'll stick to that in my findings.

I have tried and failed to determine what the very first letter might have been or where it came from, but there are fifteen surviving letters from the period of Egypt's Old Kingdom to New Kingdom (a span of about a thousand years ranging from 2686-1060 BC) and I think that's pretty amazing. These are personal correspondences depicting true emotions and well wishes for the dearly departed. They were written by various relatives of deceased peoples and left in tombs (you've got to love the effective Egyptian preservation techniques).

There was recently brought together a collection of women's letters from the Medieval period, called the Epistolae. These letters are, simply put, personal correspondences between numerous wealthy women in Medieval Europe. I haven't gotten a chance to read any of them yet.

Austen filled her books not only with the articulate nuances of British life at the 1700's but with penetrating life-changing letters. More than one of her novels is brought to climax by well-written personal prose. Austen herself wrote hundreds of letters during her life, illustrating the importance of communication and the limited capacity for it in an era before telephones or email.

Made famous by Ken Burns' documentary are the staggeringly romantic and eloquent letters of Civil War soldiers. Men, in the thick of life and struggle produced profound, true, and lovely written thoughts. I don't even much care for this documentary, but it's worth watching just to hear these beautiful personal messages read.

Carlyle wrote that, "Certainly the art of letter writing is the most miraculous of all things man has devised." I don't know about that, but it certainly has been undertaken for generations with gusto and sense of serious import.

I could go on, but the fact is that there are innumerable letters throughout history. Ovid wrote letters to his wife, Mary Queen of Scots wrote pleading letters to her cousin, the Brownings had nearly an entire relationship in letters. People think and feel and they write about it. One difference from then and now (said the Luddite slipping out) is that people had to think about what and how they wrote. People were judged by penmanship and wording. They had to obtain some sort of writing implement and ink. And so they took time to write out words (which despite what many doctors will have you think actually takes longer than typing, especially if you want it to be legible).
So consider rounding up a writing implement and some -gasp- paper and thinking and feeling and... writing.

Read Historic Letters here

Synaesthesia part 2

2011-04-09T13:36:00.001-04:00

Jean Sibelius, click here for a list of more

Quite a while ago I wrote on a fascinating condition called synaesthesia (from the Greek syn -joined and aesthesia -sense or sensation) wherein a person experiences multiple sensations for what other consider a single "sense." For instance, a synaesthetic person will "see" music or "hear" color.
Recently, after delving further into my fantastic book on color - Color, a natural history of the palette - several famous synaesthetes were brought to my attention. Most interesting to me was a notation on Jean Sibelius. He was once asked what color he wanted his stove painted. He responded "F major" and it was duly painted green (info from the Jean Sibelius Museum). I found that mesmerizing and instantly had to begin researching the topic again.

Synaesthesia was first scientifically described in 1880, but recently there have been fascinating discoveries. A team of researches identified the regions of DNA linked to the condition. They have found the chromosomal region which links to synaesthesia along chromosome 2 (the same region linked to autism). And because they were able to track it through families it is not a chromosomal mutation from its biological code. Rather, because synaesthesia tends to run in families it is considered a dominant hereditary trait.

So my question is: do synaesthetes detect something that is inherently true for all of us? Do we have correlations between colors we like and the "sounds" those colors make? For example, if I prefer music written in E flat minor over music written in C major, does that mean that E flat minor produces colors for synaesthetes that would also align with my favorite colors (I'm thinking perhaps gray and lavender) whereas C major would be colors that I do not prefer (perhaps orange or sky blue)? I have yet to find satisfactory research that shows this kind of consistency between synaesthetes and may have to accept that it is more random than revealing.

Synaesthesia comes in many forms. It can be sound and color based as I mentioned above, but it can also be emotional, numerical, tactile, alphabetical, scent, taste or even other associations. Ultimately it is a condition of mixed associations caused by "crossed wires" in the brain. The enormously diverse and nuanced world of humanity can be amazing and frustrating when it comes up short in explanations.

"Whatever's going on with these synaesthetes, it seems to be an example of the normal mechanisms that are present in all of us," says Edward Hubbard, a neuroscientist at Cornell University in New York. "It's the sort of randomness that gets wiped out, trained away, overwhelmed by learning and cultural factors" in most people, but not in synaesthetes, he says.

2011-04-01T15:56:00.000-04:00

Over at Bloom 12 we're undertaking a month of four real letters a week for four weeks. That got me thinking about the history of letters and reminded me of one of my favorite high school assignments when our English teacher had us research historical love letters and create our own.
So, I've done some research and plan to within the next few days here write a post on the history of letters.

Everyday things

2011-03-26T09:38:00.002-04:00

A few weeks ago I stumbled across some photo coasters at an estate sale. Not being one for photo coasters but being in desperate need of coasters I bought them and decided to do something fun with it. I came up with the idea to do various tree leaf sketches on each. The tree varieties are native to various places I have lived. These were the results:

Fire it up!

2011-03-09T12:15:00.000-05:00

Today we are loading the wood kiln! There are many general kiln types -delineated by their source of fuel: i.e. electric, gas, wood- and there are many types of wood kilns within that distinction. A kiln can be fired in an oxidation or reduction process. As the names suggest, oxidation firings allow for a lot of oxygen to enter into the firing atmosphere whereas reduction firings reduce the amount of oxygen in the firing atmosphere. An electric kiln is always fired in oxidation. Our wood kiln will be fired in a reduction process, though we recently learned from Adam Field about a family business in Korea making onggi pots by oxidation firing.
Among the types of wood kilns housed at the Waubonsee kiln yard are anagama, bourry box train, and cross draft tube. It is the bourry box train kiln that we are loading today. This long tunnel of brick has side stoking openings in its sides. It will be fired approximately four days and we will unload on Wednesday next week. I am excited for the results and only hope I don't lose any pieces in the firing.

Two of life's pleasures: food & photography

2011-02-10T19:55:00.004-05:00

I was so delighted when a dear friend of mine shared this link. There are some absolutely fabulous pictures of breakfast food and drink. Do give it a look. You'll remember why you love breakfast so much. http://bkfst.tumblr.com/

my breakfast photo

Progress

2011-02-09T21:39:00.002-05:00

Today I threw the biggest piece I have ever done on a wheel. It wasn't impressive by potter's standards (only nearly 8lbs.), but I was pleased with it. I hope it will work out well throughout the trimming and firing process. I know that it will shrink a lot so I'll have to work on making a platter that will stay platter sized. Also, I'm still working to come up with some marks that are characteristically "me."

On Why People Love Snow

2011-02-02T16:06:00.002-05:00

That's our car there, or um there?

When I woke up this morning I expected howling winds and torrents of snow assaulting our apartment windows. But in fact I was greeted by gray skies with a little bit of...what's that? blue sky?! Yep, blue skies coming out to greet us post-blizzard. "Well," I thought, "this is unacceptable." They told us to expect The Blizzard of 2011; something epic, gargantuan, a story to tell our grandchildren. I should stop and clear any doubt of the fact: I love snow. And when I took a cursory look outside this morning all the school cancellations and firewood purchasing seemed all for naught. I was crestfallen....

But then there were the cinnamon rolls and pleasant company. School was canceled as I mentioned and so our neighbors were able to join us for a breakfast of cinnamon rolls. Ok, this day is looking a little better.

And then Adam and I went for a walk. All about there were massive drifts. The air was alive with the distant whir of snow-blowers in action. Snow, especially in large quantities, makes people happy (I'm not just talking about me, but I was very happy). It's a leveler, a unifier, a camaraderie-maker. What's not to love about having no means of transportation besides your snow boots, seeing the roads in a single-lane plowed channel (while your car remains snowed in), and greeting your neighbors walking down this channel bedecked in snow boots and snugly hats. Everyone is happier after a snow, like that guy down the street snowplowing with a large cigar hanging from his lips (he's definitely making the most of his day).

snowplow parking lot piles! (photo courtesy Z.W.)

Something Old Something New Something Borrow Something Blue

2011-01-28T12:27:00.000-05:00

I rather like this classic adage for weddings. So I thought it could be fun to do a little explanation of what I did for my old, new, borrow, and blue even though I'm about 7 months late in describing it.


Old: a rose from my great great Grandmother's rosebush in my hair

New: my dress and shoes and a fabulous hairpiece made by my sister in-law

Borrowed: I borrowed my mom's pearls for the day

Blue: (above and below) I wrapped the stems of my bouquet in a blue tapestry fabric that I sewed the week before

Many hats

2011-01-27T23:12:00.001-05:00

While I may wish that this post was really about the delights of variable head fashion and my extensive knowledge of it (I have no such knowledge, but am a great enthusiast), it is in fact about the adventures of being a substitute teacher. I have been kept "slightly but not as much as I'd like to be" busy by the opportunity to sub at the school where I used to be a teacher. I've gotten to teach a lesson on the Constitution to sixth graders and I was there today teaching my first third grade Latin lesson. Tomorrow I will begin the day by teaching the wonders of earth science, chemistry, and -my favorite- biological genetics complete with punnett squares! I will finish up by giving a lecture to 2nd graders on Dutch master, Vermeer. Did I mention this school is awesome and by no means typical?

And because I really do love hats. Here are some fantastic ones that I've recently found on etsy.com.

Thanks, Fire Dept.

2011-01-25T15:24:00.001-05:00

Today I made my first batch of clay. When I got home, I made my first 9-1-1 call. Thankfully it was rather benign, but as with any emergency it probably could have been worse.

I had a baked potato in and an afghan on the couch. I was on the phone with my mom and all ready to enjoy a relaxed lunch. Then, I smelled something funny. That’s odd, it rather stunk. Could it be me? Why would I smell it now? I know I didn’t shower this morning in anticipation of an afternoon run, but really? I don’t smell that bad…do I? Then I noticed a wisp of smoke in the air! “Mom, something’s smoking,” I said. The potato? No. Some random burner I left on? No, everything was off and as it should be. But then I saw it right there in the wall: my electric socket was smoking and quickly turning brown around the ominous slits that opened to the power beneath. Odd-weird-scary-this has never happened-what do I do-is it going to burst into flame-I don’t have a fire extinguisher-do something now – the thoughts raced. I quickly turned off the fuse box. “Call 911,” mom suggested. It seemed silly; wouldn’t they think I was over-reacting? Wouldn’t I just be a nuisance at this point? But I did call and calmly relayed the necessary information, random segments from Rescue 911 episodes playing in my head.
The fire department showed up. They checked the outlet using a cosmic heat sensor camera, told me I was very smart indeed for shutting off the power so quickly (thanks for that one, Mom), , and –after dismantling my outlet– turned over the “clean up” to the apartment management (who showed up just after they did).
By the way, I’m buying a fire extinguisher today.

Ceramics III

2011-01-24T22:59:00.002-05:00

"Baptism by fire" is one of those terms I've used jokingly through the years. However, when it comes to a situation where such a phrase is the only apt description? -panic! I realized a couple things tonight at my new class:

1. I was tired and this skewed the rest of the things I realized.
2. New people are not always welcoming.
3. "I don't know how to do 'that' (x,y,or z)!"
4. I probably more aptly qualify for Ceramics I 1/2 (see #3)
5. Even something I was sure I loved can be a lot of work.
6. No matter how much I may think I like something it would always be more fun with friends and not a bunch of new people.

But alas, all of the above are true and may continue to be true as I make my way into this new realm of serious, talented, perhaps slightly less down to earth than I was hoping: people. I'm hoping in the weeks to come that all this overwhelmed feeling will become excitement.

Movie Review

2011-01-22T17:34:00.002-05:00

We've just returned from viewing The King's Speech at a local theater. From the outset, I must admit to absolutely loving this film. Aided by a storyline simple in its particulars, the cinematography shines with a beautiful take on the realistic and a subtle cool hued palette. Excellent performances by Colin Firth, Geoffrey Rush, and a star-studded cast of supporters (Helena Bonham Carter, Anthony Andrews, Michael Gambon, and Timothy Spall to name a few) create dynamic characters with subtle intricacies that bring the historic relationships into the viewer's realm of emotional familiarity. The simple details of an historic time line, easily put down in a history textbook, become a dramatic and personal. I do hope to see this film winning at least a couple awards this year.

Click HERE to hear an original speech from the king.

New

2011-01-14T16:12:00.007-05:00

My sister in-law has been a faithful poster for years. Everything she writes and finds just fascinates me. She is clever, intelligent, creative, and possesses an undaunted energy that I will probably forever envy. I've been encouraged to take up consistent blog thought again.

I was a fearless child. I tried to swim in a pool when I in fact didn't know how to swim. I jumped off high things; scrambled across rocks. I climbed any tree available. Consequently I ended up with legs and knees about as far away from a model's as a cucumber is from a steak. That said, it has taken me quite a while to realize that I can still live fearlessly. I don't have to live in the shadows of others. For whatever reason, my fearless childhood graduated into an adulthood of trepidations. Please don't anticipate in this some pending self-help, me first, "I am the supreme goddess of the world" doctrine. I merely state that I have lived with self-imposed shadows for many years. Shadows and whispers of lies. Satan's lies in fact. Lies against the God I know and am loved by. I have played the comparison game and missed out on unique opportunities.

Ok, so where does that glimmer of hope, reason I'm writing this stuff in the first place come in? Now:
Being married is one of the best things to ever happen to me. What you're expecting is probably that I will launch into a narrative of my sweet supporting husband who tells me everything I do is perfect. My husband is wonderful, and far sweeter and self-sacrificing than I would ever be able to delineate in words. But...I am not perfect. And he knows it. Part of the beauty of being married to someone who truly loves me is that he doesn't let me sit in an acrophobic-like state and let life pass me by. He suggests, no insists that I live, live fully as the person that God created me to be. It is at times cliche to say that we are made individually like no other, but I do think we forget it nearly as often if not more than we say it. So I think it warrants being said again. We are unique, special, and completely messed up sinners. But we're created in the image of the Almighty and that is something to hope about.

Poking around online

2011-01-14T15:48:00.003-05:00

I found the most ridiculous "shoe" I've seen in a long time. I understand in some sense the ideas of high fashion (truly no pun intended) but....seriously?

2009-11-12T16:23:00.002-05:00

A new favorite website of mine is this excellent journal of gastronomical exploits: He Feasts.

If you don't understand why hamburgers "flame broiled" assembly line style are as deteriorating to your aesthetic growth as they are encouraging to your waistline's growth, give it a read. You may just learn a thing or two.

And zest, for the record, has nothing to do with "antibacterial."

bottle glass

2009-08-21T16:52:00.004-04:00

I have a penchant for wine things and glass. This made me very excited.
These are wine bottles made into glasses

2009-06-07T21:29:00.003-04:00

Dan Auerbach has a new solo acoustic album called Keep It Hid - check it out.

Reformation & Music Conference

2009-04-09T11:30:00.002-04:00

Here are some worth while and edifying lectures on the Reformation and its impact on music.

Capturing the Clouds

2009-03-13T14:22:00.004-04:00

Unique installation art at the Museum of water Source O Rama, Chaudfontaine, Belgium.

2009-03-04T19:09:00.004-05:00

The world, fallen as it is, is not in some great upheaval of goodness. But we have a duty and some might say a privilege of being lights within it.
In doing so, I believe we also have an obligation to be socially aware and sensitive to the needy. There are so many great ways we can do this on a large or small scale. One way that I recently found out about is Toms Shoes - eco friendly shoes with a moral mission. It's worth checking out even if your feet don't need to be newly clad.

2009-02-04T20:04:00.002-05:00

I'm always on the look out for great things made of clay. A recent find is this fantastic vase from Magnum Pottery.

Did you know?

2008-12-08T11:33:00.002-05:00

Ginger Rogers won an oscar for best actress. After having made ten films with Fred Astaire, she wanted to be taken more seriously as an actress. She starred in Kitty Foyle and won the oscar, beating out Katharine Hepburn who said she was the actress and Ginger the fluff.
Rogers is rather good in this film, but I have to admit I'm still a sucker for a flowing skirt and tapping feet and she and Astaire make their way across the screen in any number of their movies.

go local

2008-11-30T18:43:00.006-05:00

I love everything about food, especially local food. A carrot tastes better if you've pulled it out of the ground and eaten it with a little dirt on it and berries are better if eaten while picking them.
Winter can seem to put a stop to these lovely occupations, but there's still lots of good things to be found in season in the winter - citrus fruits being my personal favorite.

Also, the best milk I've ever had came from Organic Valley; it's a nationwide coop that highlights local farmers in their own regions. Check it out.

2008-11-21T18:59:00.005-05:00

If you want to live in a Dr. Seuss house, you'll need to shop at Dust Furniture.
Some of the pieces are, I think, quite artistic.

How cool is this?

2008-11-16T18:42:00.007-05:00

I just found out about this and I think it's so cool. Apparently the pods of mesquite plants can be ground into a gluten free flour. Mesquite pods, as in mesquite barbecue -it's the wood that's used for barbecue. The flour has glutenous properties and it can even be used to create a sweet caramel flavoring.

Here's an article on it.

Hear color; taste sound

2008-11-16T18:07:00.005-05:00

Today I was listening to a radio program from The Infinite Mind (whose website is unfortunately not yet updated to include this program) on SYNESTHESIA.
It was truly fascinating to hear how interactive the senses can be. For example, some people listen to music and see color or see a bird fly and hear it's melody, or taste something and feel corresponding sensations in their fingertips. The program highlighted the common defining characteristic of subconsciously associating colors with letters. Once the website is updated, it would be well worth venturing there to listen to the segment. It's fascinating.

Listening to the program I at first felt jealous -I wanted to be delightfully hyper-sensitive and experience the world fully. But then I realized that while I believe this condition of interactive, hyper-sensory perceptions is present as a real condition in some people, it can be over-emphasized. To say that there are two blocks of people -those who have the condition and those who do not- is a simplification of the intricacies of everyone's perceptions. People who are not synesthetics can still experience things. Creative people are often acutely sensitive without having this condition. And "ordinary" people can feel something in a uniquely keen way. The difference is that synesthetics experience things in a documentable and similar way each time they experience it: i.e. the letter A will always be red.

Color affects mood or behavior and I believe that, for example, hearing music which conjures up those same feelings can give that music a sense of color. I am not a synesthetic, but I see, feel, hear, and taste color, music, poetry etc. It's all a matter of listening (in the broadest sense of the word) to the simple actualities around us. Birds have music, motion, and color. So do trees. Everything has individual characteristics and I hope no one forgets to be aware of that; everyone is capable to experience and add to the beauty.

Cheese, Gromit!

2008-10-23T15:16:00.005-04:00

The first time I think I ever realized cheese could be absolutely amazing I was in eighth grade living in Minnesota. We had foodie friends who obliged us by introducing us to our Norwegian food heritage. I'd had lefsa and lingonberries before, but cheese had always been one of those things I dismissed with the simple explanation: "I don't really like it." There had been too many potluck dinners with mysterious casseroles, sweating squares of different colors impaled on toothpicks and presented on paper plates, and smoldering vats of Velveeta emitting toxic aromas to tempt me into the word I had been told was "cheese."

Our friends told us we had to try Jarlsberg. The very name sounded exciting; grown up and imported.

A local fish monger sold flaky smoked salmon and artisan cheeses (unrecognizable from my earlier impressions of the food). One day, we bought some cracked black-pepper salmon and a wedge of Jarlsberg. We ate it off of wood cutting boards in front of the fire while we talked into the night. That, and subsequent cheese and wine fireside dinners remain in my memory as some of the best evenings I've ever spent.

I've since added more exotic flavors, but years later Jarlsberg still holds a special place in the affections of my taste-buds. Now I prefer it with a nice Mosel Kabinett (2006 from the Friedrich-Wilhelm-Gymansium vintner if you can find it) or in an omelet with sauteed red peppers, but my fridge is seldom without it.

La Folia

2008-10-01T12:22:00.003-04:00

I was watching From the Top on PBS last Sunday and heard a remarkable piece I'd never heard before -La Folia. Apparently it is the most often varied piece (has had the most variations inspired by it) in all of western history. It is well worth investigating. It's the sort of violin piece that gives you chills because of its piercing simplicity and tortured bereavement. The thirteen year old violinist did it great justice I feel, but you can check out the performance and see for yourself.

New Music

2008-08-21T00:23:00.006-04:00

Black Keys have again reached the "heck yeah" side of my musical taste with their new album, Attack and Release
I've always enjoyed the garage band feel of their previous albums, but in this one their slight departure from the aesthetic of Rubber Factory (actually recorded in said factory) is not without merit. (Never fear there are still some garage punk tunes to get the head moving and the air guitar playing).
In this album, the Black Keys' style is more decisively developed and the album has a more completed and less "jam session" feeling (complete with rock ballad?). The amazing talent of Patrick Carney and Dan Auerbach's duo is only enhanced by the enlisted accompaniment of some of today's best musicians (though lesser known popularly) including two Tom Waits' band veterans Marc Ribot and Ralph Carney.
I'd recommend checking it out, especially track 4 (although I still think Rubber Factory is my favorite).

Charley Harper

2008-08-18T23:36:00.004-04:00

I've always been a push-over for children's books with good illustrations. Recently Charley Harper has come to my attention, especially his ABC's book and also one entitled Birds & Words. Check it out. His crisp colorful illustrations are captivating.

More Than Popcorn

2008-07-23T14:28:00.007-04:00

You can only see a movie for the first time once. It is the unfortunate reality of the creative delight of movies. Luckily we rarely catch everything in the first viewing (if the movie is good and complex, full of things for us to consider) and want to see it again. But there is still a little less magic. The magic is easy to feel, but hard to concretely explain.
But we aren't alone. We don't have this one-time experience without the company of others' delight.

Sometimes my favorite movie-going excursions are summer blockbusters, the kind everyone goes to see with wild anticipation. This usually makes for the best crowds. The crowd is part of the inexplicable magic of such a move; strangers sitting together in a jam-packed theater (only armrests and cup-holders between) to enjoy mutual wonderment. A few nights ago, I had the pleasure of this sort of experience at my first viewing of The Dark Knight.

Sitting in the theater (towards the back and center if I'm lucky) I am surrounded by so much polite, boisterous, and eager chatter that I might mistake the locale for an aviary. But then, the surround speakers kick on and swallow the theater in their completeness, sinking their teeth deep into the heavily curtained walls. Suddenly the screen flickers on and everyone is immediately silenced to enjoy the experience of the first thunderous sounds. The lights slowly dim, but we hardly notice. The previews begin and there are tidbits of interjection after each:
"that looks good"
"ooo"
"are you kidding?"
"awwwesooome"

The previews finish and our minds strap in.
If it's a good movie, we sit, riveted. There is little reaction throughout apart from the widening and narrowing of our eyes as our emotions mimic that of the on-screen characters. Occasionally there is a gasp, chuckle, or cringe. When the movie finishes, there is just the smallest split second of utter silence from the crowd and the credits' music seems a distant background memory. Then everyone lets out a sigh of wonder and the bustle of departure begins, accompanied by numerous exaltations.
It was a good movie. A good singular experience of magic.

addendum

2008-07-14T09:51:00.002-04:00

Upon reading further in The Ethical Gourmet, I think it is only right to state that the author does make a slight allowance for Christian organizations that have spoken out in defense of the environment. However, it seems to me that he does so with an air of sarcasm.

Despite the first chapter (with which I had a rocky relationship) I must say that ultimately I respect the author's motivation of increasing awareness and giving concerned people a source for more ethically raised food. An especially important chapter is that on meats. To anyone looking for further reading on the matter I would recommend the book Dominon which covers similar ethical concerns.

Christian = anti-environment? I don't think so...

2008-07-12T23:16:00.005-04:00

I recently began reading a book entitled The Ethical Gourmet with great anticipation of the prospect of a book geared towards an understanding of the importance of ethical food production and consumption. Within the first dozen pages I was quickly incensed at the blatant evangelical bashing.

The author begins with an introduction explaining the travesty of choosing something based solely upon its monetary cost (ironically despite all other 'costs'). "Big box" stores are mentioned, but there is also a lingering hope that, "people do the right thing if all else is equal." This hope is carried through the introduction with promises of ethical consumer instruction to follow.

Directly following this optimistic beginning the author begins to point fingers and cite those who stand in the way of ethical progress in food production. However, here the author makes sweeping allowances for connoisseurs and innocently naive consumers -intimated that the former are in an ethically superior class of their own and that the latter are not unethical, only uninformed. Despite these slightly unjust conclusions -connoisseurs are not nearly as rare or superior as many of them believe and some naive consumers are voluntarily clinging to their ecological blinders out of convenience- the author finishes the section with a well-organized argument for the need to correctly regulate food and understand the consequences of incorrectly doing so.

As with many environmentalists, the author soon makes incorrect generalizations about his perceived opposition. According to the author, the evangelical right ultimately believes that the coming of the Messiah necessitates a pro-earth-destroying policy. The greatest jaw drop for me was the claim that "free-for-all polluters can easily be shrugged off by anyone who believes...that environmental degradation is part of God's divine plan," a sentence that carried a not so subtle implication that evangelicals are rejoicing over growing landfills. Apparently the author has never heard or understood the term stewardship.

"Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and
over every living thing that moves on the earth" (Genesis 1:28)

A Christian desire to "subdue" may be perceived as anti-earth only in the respect that it is not an earth-worshipping perspective. As with anything, those given the power to rule have a humbling responsibility for what they rule. In the case of Christians towards the environment, it is a Christian's duty to tend and protect the earth. The stewardship directive was dictated to man prior to the fall and is therefore not the result of a corrective act to subdue a fallen, wild earth, but rather it is part of the ordained created order.

"'Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the surface of all the earth and every tree which has fruit
yielding seed; it shall be food for you; and to every beast of the earth and to every bird of the sky and to every thing that
moves on the earth which has life, I have given every green plant for food'; and it was so." Genesis 1:29-30

Following this narrative of God's giving the earth to man (note: an earth, with which man shares its bounty of food) God announces His pleasure with the created order, finding it "very good." The enmity of man and the earth ("cursed is the ground because of you; in toil toil you will eat of it" Gen. 3:17) is not a sign that man is devoid of responsibility for the earth. The difficulty of man's relationship with the world did not void the relationship itself. God had already established the created order, only now it wouldn't be easy. Caring for the environment and gleaning food from the earth aren't easy, but never does God say that this difficulty justifies unethical ecological conduct.

Most Christians understand this weighty directive and don't seek to destroy the earth to hasten the Second Coming. We know the earth isn't perfect and that God is the only One who can truly make all things right. But Christians who understand their earth bound duty will sympathetically conduct themselves in regards to the earth (including its food supply) in humble anticipation of the day when the imperfections of earth will be made right through the sovereignty of God.

whence or thence

2008-06-21T23:08:00.007-04:00

Once someone pointed out to me that the first stanza of Psalm 121 is often misunderstood. If everyone read Hebrew it would not be a concern, but even if people just understood the conceptual semantics of grammar and poetry in English translation it would make things much simpler.

"I lift up my eyes to the hills -
From whence comes my help?
My help comes from the LORD
Who made heaven and earth"
Ps. 121:1-2

The misunderstanding is more unfortunate than actually dangerous to doctrine I think. People miss out on the magnificence of the passage when they misunderstand the intent of the grammar and poetic structure.
People may think this passage as something mighty -the Lord comes from the hills- thinking that hills are lofty and secure. But the meaning is of course much greater than that when we consider that "whence" and "thence" are not interchangeable antiquities of language. If help comes from the hills, the proper phrase would be something like 'I lift up my eyes to the hills, From thence comes my help.'
Whence creates a question in reaction to the previous statement. The Psalmist says:
"I lift up my eyes..." but I don't see help there in the hills. So where does my help come from (from whence). He asks where his help comes from because he knows it does not come from the hills.
The poetic structure gives the answer in the following line:
"My help comes from the LORD"
Not only is help from the LORD, but the LORD who made the heaven and the earth. He is not subject to use the apparent greatness of the hills as a point of reference. Because He created the hills, He is clearly greater than them.

Just something to think about.

poem

2008-06-04T00:04:00.002-04:00

Love
by Morgan Mertz

My kids ask me-
"Why can't they just say what they mean?"
As I ask them to read just one more poem,
Words seemingly incomprehensible, scrawled across the page.
But I think-
"Who does say what they mean?"
Each day man rises
Attempting to tackle
The great feat of communication
Of life into words,
With varying degrees of success,
Failure.
Take love-
Can I really say it
Without mentioning
Myself, age six, lifted
By hands and feet
And swung into the air between my father's legs?
Who would understand it
If I left out
The open door
And open arms
That greet my tear-stained face?
Is it even worth mentioning
If I can't tell you
That his hair was a lion's mane
Falling into my eyes when we kissed?
And why bother
If it didn't include my brother,
Drinking wine together on the beach,
Making sure my heart
Isn't broken.
Yes,
I can say that I loved.
But I'd rather tell you
That I couldn't say
Hello
to that lanky redhead,
That the countryside was dotted
With poppies,
That I couldn't have made breakfast
Without him,
That we steal
Each other's sweaters
Because that's
What I really mean.

more thoughts on color

2008-06-03T11:13:00.003-04:00

Here I am specifically tackling more ideas that have come about in reference to the sense of sight as it relates to color. (I intend to follow up at a later date on smell and taste as I gather information and thoughts)

The question of intention versus scientific chance has been recently brought to my attention concerning color:

"Do you really think that color is 'established by God'? Because the kind of color we can see is really just a reference to certain wavelengths (about 400-700nm )of refracted light ("white" light). So that fact and opinion of color existence has an almost primary psychological element."

Is color just a mere psychological transfer of wavelengths through the brain that interprets the resulting refraction and absorption of light into color. Yes, the brain is responsible for color, but I don't agree with leaving it as "merely" that -the brain's reaction to physical surroundings. Art is not just a scientific endeavor, playing with the facts of absorption and refraction. I skimmed this in my previous post with a mention of a "creative Creator." That may not make sense since I was addressing the idea of "good art," but it applies to this approach as well.

Ultimately, I don't believe science and aesthetics have a vast chasm of dichotomy between them. Color can be explained scientifically, but that doesn't make it less aesthetic or spiritual. While belief in a Saving Creator -one who died and rose again for the salvation of mankind- is ultimately faith based, physical elements of creation point to what is commonly referred to as "intelligent design." This "intelligent design" includes the creation of light and color and the means for mankind to view and appreciate it. It is the interaction of the existence of color and the creative design of our physical person that allows us to see it that in this sense refers to intelligent design. Consider, if light wavelengths existed, but our brains did not interpret them into color, color would still exist. But our brains do interpret them into color. That is the result of interaction of design. Color is designed a certain way as are our brains to see it.

What I refer to in my previous post "on color" is that we don't usually consider why or how we see color. We only know that we see it and it forms a subconscious frame of reference. By addressing a "Creative Creator" whether consciously or unconsciously in art, the artist employs this natural frame of reference (including, but not limited to colors created to interact with each other in a specific way that our eye interprets as pleasing). Good art, as I describe it, skillfully uses this frame of reference (color interaction etc.). The use of it points to the Creator (who creatively created color and the means to see it). Whether the viewer knows it or not, they understand the reference in the same way a reader might subconsciously recognize an allusion.

This universal understanding of color and how it interacts is the reason we can appreciate art that uses it. The scientific interaction of wavelength and psychological interpretation of color make this appreciation possible. Color is "established by God." We see the magnificent beauty of color and interpret it because of its and our design.

Bella

2008-05-09T18:44:00.004-04:00

I recently had the opportunity to see this somewhat unconventional, off the beaten path sort of movie, Bella. I found it tremendous and would highly recommend it (especially to a select few people whom I know share my taste in film).
The movie itself was self-consciously film. It was drastically different in its construct from a play, at times using music and pictured emotion in lieu of dialogue. It mirrored real life in its depiction of struggles, but brought out the best of the world by highlighting friendship, sacrifice, kindness, and loyalty to family, friends, and ideals. There is artistic cinematography and real connection with the characters. It's the sort of movie that reminds you life is full of choices and circumstances and how you react determines the sort of person you are. It is a film certainly worth the hour and a half it takes to watch.
"Because how we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives." -Annie Dillard

thoughts on color

2008-04-24T01:37:00.007-04:00

Late night discussions prompted the following which is currently all an excited and incomplete jumble.

I was talking with my dad and mom about food and flavor and touched on a few points that I have discussed earlier concerning General Revelation. I made a passing remark that it was much like my views on art and color relation. Ultimately God gives us tools for creativity. By employing them and drawing upon our given resources we become little reflections of His creativity.
The conversation trailed on and my dad asked just what were these deep-seeded beliefs I held in respect to color. I'm afraid what followed was said with great enthusiasm and may have been eloquent, but I am unable to duplicate it in my present sedation.

I began by espousing my belief that all good art must have one common thread - it must have some reference to a creative Creator. Where that deals with color relation it becomes something absolutely unavoidable. It is automatic; a frame of reference we all share. Color is established by God and in many ways it is a gift from Him, just as our myriad of taste receptors are a means to enjoy nutritional beauty. We gather our knowledge of color from a established notion of color; what it is how it interacts and so on. This pre-conceived notion is not of our own manufacturing. It exists because God created it.

When God said "let there be light" He created not only light itself, but the idea of light. As there was no such thing as light it wasn't like our instinctively turning on a lamp in a dark room. This split of light and dark is the basis for color relation being second nature to us. In the same way that we take for granted all that it meant when God said "light" (that is that light exists) we take for granted its effects -specifically: color.

It is a fact, not an opinion that colors exist and interact. Cool tones set themselves apart from warm tones, some hues clash etc. Using the example of my own bedroom, my lavender/gray walls create an enhancing background for my cardinal red quilt. There are neutrals, cool tones, warm tones and a meticulous spider-web of classifications beyond.

God created such marvelous physicality to our existence. We have senses that can teach us about Him, not fully of course, but far more than we usually give them credit.

Silver lining

2008-03-31T01:08:00.003-04:00

It's a curious thing that misery loves company. It's not that we want to see others suffer. We just don't want to feel like a loser when we feel we've left our heart or sanity or achievement behind us. We want someone who was with us back there on the road when all that garbage dropped out of our suitcase. More importantly, we want them to be on the road with us now. We know the road behind us and it's not that we don't believe there is at least a dirt trail ahead, but sometimes we just need a wallowing buddy to break out the pint of ice cream and grab us a spoon.
I've had this service performed for me. Recently it was more metaphorically executed, but the assistance was only slightly less.
Sharing grief -or even just glum- should never be underestimated. It's not as bad as people think. To be understood at our low points is truly a great thing (depending on the degree of wallowing it is a great feat for any friend to understand the words emitted through our pillows in between sniffles).
A faithful friend is a sturdy shelter. Taken in stride, wallowing can be a good thing because it requires us to seek that shelter even if we only think misery loves company.

some thoughts on food

2008-03-18T19:43:00.007-04:00

I'm tossing around some ideas for an short piece on food. So the following are half-formed thoughts in mostly complete sentences.
Trailing off on ideas of sustenance, provision, and giving thanks I arrived at General Revelation. It may seem a roundabout route to take for such a topic, but I believe General Revelation is often misinterpreted or under-represented especially when it comes to food.
In brief summation General Revelation refers to nature itself and how God is revealed within it. But people don't take it far enough if they speak of nature as a whole without mentioning its intricacies. And that brings me back to food.
God designed the world to yield food. But He could have simply made one single all encompassing food that fulfilled all our nutritional needs and not added any creative variety. One has only to look at the world around us to understand that God chooses to be creative. He extends that ability to us as well.
Prior to the Age of Discovery and trade expansion ingredients lacked much variety, but indigenous peoples came up with a variety of different dishes based on methods of preparation. Following world exploration and migration of ethnicities, we see that people embrace new flavors with an understanding that the world of flavors fits together internationally as well. Food is like a giant puzzle that spans the world and each continent has pieces that interlock with foreign lands. Something as "American as apple pie" contains cinnamon (native to Sri Lanka). People have always sought creative variety in food and God provides endless means for it through the world He created.

life as a cobbler's elf

2008-03-16T02:04:00.003-04:00

So far I haven't carved any metaphorical masterpieces. More often than not I feel I am using a very tiny chisel to make very tiny indentations on what seems to be of very tiny importance to the grand scheme of life. -I don't remember why, but the tiny chisels bit is something my brother brought up in a conversation on elves (you'd have to know my family to understand why random conversations on elves can appear in the regular course of life).

When I was recently struggling in my life's obscurity, my eldest brother advised me to write about something that matters to me. I suppose it's the old mantra that one should write what one knows. My life supplies me with plenty of interests and passions, but currently few adventures. So it makes sense that my brother did not tell me to write of my adventures, but of life. And that got me thinking: of chisels and lives and importance ("and cabbages and kings")...He didn't tell me to write the grandiose because life isn't made up of the grandiose.
"37 seconds well-lived is a lifetime"

Of a Saturday...

2008-03-09T22:54:00.003-04:00

Coffee shops scare me. I'm always hung up on wondering just how cool you have to be to belong. (Do "independent counter-cultural I'm so different from you scarf and tight pant wearing city dwellers" even 'belong'?). Do my not so tight pants give me away? Does my awkward insecurity fly like a banner from a topsail on a clear day? We can always pretend that as I take refuge in my writing at this table that I somehow make myself mysterious and intriguing.
The waiter is nice (although he definitely "belongs"). His hair is scruffy. He asks me what I'm reading. Thank goodness I grabbed John Cheever on my way out the door and he didn't catch me with something embarrassing. For a moment I pretend I'm artsy and literary. I drop some smart comment about Cheever's descriptive voice. He walks off after our chat and I take a sip of my coffee and make a note in the margin. I can do this...
"All the world's a stage"
So what if I have stage fright?

2008-01-08T00:23:00.000-05:00

I will really miss my college days and seeing the whole band (Like Summer) at AEX live. Good thing they're still performing, but seriously, Steve Gretz should get this on an album: http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=76928595

2007-12-05T12:14:00.000-05:00

Just a little proof that my family has a quirky sense of humor...
We laughed at this video, a lot.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=llf_Y7enV1E

Love, "who lit this flame in us?"

2007-11-18T21:24:00.000-05:00

I've just listened to Jeff Buckley's rendition of "Halleluiah." I'm always struck by this song. I can't help but feel that for all its ethereal emotion the song is in fact about human failing. It isn't the happiest interpretation, but each line conveys some sense of human's committment to love and continued failing to perfectly fulfill it. The words almost drip with tears. The biblicial references unavoiadably highlight instances in which humans let lust alter their interpretations of love and what it truly means. The "cold and broken halleluiah" points to the distortion that sin puts upon true love. The song does not ultimately point to the hope of true love -it focuses more on the shortcomings and desperate realization of inadequacy- but by paradox it does reveal the only true form of perfect love, G-d's love.

Appearances matter?

2007-11-04T00:20:00.000-04:00

No one wants to be thought a fool. For all the narcicism that is encouraged in today's society and the 'be yourself' gospel people still worry that how they appear won't be good enough in the estimation of those around them.
Informal social control is the official term for all those little ways that society is kept "normal." In some instances this is a good thing. It's an even better thing when intergrated into strong morals and values where children are brought up to be honorable men and women. But bumps will still occur and awkwardness is unavoidable. There will always be those moments like the ones dreaded by Kathleen Kelly in "You've Got Mail" where you think of what to say only after it's too late.
But no one can deny that those people who possess the uncany nack of putting others at ease while being unestimably unique are truly endearing.
I try not to engross myself in tv too frequently, but I must admit that "Pushing Daisies" is one of my new favorites. In it, there is a character, Chuck (a girl), who is unexpectedly given a second chance at life. She is a cheerful sort of person who always thinks of others. She decides that, having been given a second chance, she will never miss opportunities and recognize that life is worth living and in investing in people is important. It's true. If we believe that this life is but a breath then what are we anxious about? Yes appearances matter. It matters to be honorable and kind. But we should never be deterred from these actions, even if it means we will be viewed as eccentric.

Sing to the Lord A New Song

2007-10-22T16:23:00.002-04:00

This past weekend I was at a women's retreat. As much as I like people, I needed a little "regain my sanity by spending some time alone" time. So I took a walk in the lovely woods surrounding Beuna Vista.
It occured to me while I was walking that though I often want to sing aloud when I am alone I can't always find the right words to say. This particular day there was so much beauty in God's creation that I felt I was intruding and the addition of my voice could hardly be considered an addition when creation was already doing such a splendid job of raising its own voice to sing of the Creator. "The mountains and hills will break forth into shouts of joy before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands." -Isaiah 55:12
But nature, though in His care, is not chosen by God. We, His people are chosen. And though the earth may sing, we are called to sing aloud our own story, or rather Christ's story, our redemption. If the mountains and trees can be thankful to their Creator how much more should we, His children, be joyful?
"O for a thousand tongues to sing my great Redeemer's praise, the glories of my God and King, the triumphs of His grace."

The Weather -because there's nothing else to talk about

2007-10-15T10:49:00.000-04:00

Two days ago it was 77 degrees. This morning there was frost on the ground. It turns out, Colorado has quirky weather.

-Upon leaving Duluth I was concerned that interesting weather would be behind me. There's just something wonderfully unique at stepping out of the airport on Christmas break into 30 below (without windchill) that makes you feel special.-
Last year's winter (my first in Colorado) did not disappoint. The copious amounts of snow made me excited for my second experience. I am hoping that sometime around November it will snow and then sometime in March or April it will leave. I will certainly miss Duluth winters (see pictures), but for now I'm just enjoying the frost.

Happiness comes in small packages

2007-10-07T20:03:00.000-04:00

I own a pair of green shoes that make me exceedingly happy. Ok, truth be told I own three pairs of green shoes, but in my defense they are different styles and certainly different shades.
I believe in enjoying the small things in life. This isn't always easy to do. Moths and unidentified sticky substances and all things icky can put a damper on this perspective. Attitude helps a lot for this sort of thing, as do actions. Simply avoid mysterious icky sticky things and run away from moths (or get your dad or brothers to do away with them for you -we won't say kill, that seems harsh). But there are so many other lovely things to consider.
Granted, having one's head in the clouds seems trite and downright silly. But i'm not talking about stupidity, just adding a dash of Pollyanna to the everyday.
In the end, I would recommend you get a pair of green shoes. oh and do look down while you walk so as not to step on ants.

2007-10-04T16:07:00.000-04:00

As Christians we receive the fullness of God's love now. I know that's a simple statement, but the magnitude of it truly struck me today. My circumstances don't dictate the measure of God's love. When I am depressed and broken, or exuberant and cheerful it doesn't mean God loves me more or less. For some reason I always assumed that when I was in a rut, grumpy and hating everything somehow God would come to my rescue. He would love me more because of my dampened spirits and dismal circumstances. But His faithfulness is unfaltering. He doesn't proportion it according to our mood as if He were administering an extra dose of cough syrup on a particularly blustery winter day. On the stormy days His love is as constant as on smooth waters.
Another truth that was brought to light for me today was that His love manifests itself as what it best for us. In reference to a sermon I heard a few weeks ago, He cares for us particularly by not giving us everything we "want" exactly when we want it.
God is great and we are weak. Rest in Him.

Pit Stop

2007-10-01T22:12:00.000-04:00

A gas station is a poetic place to be after dark, especially if the customers are few. Filling a tank is such an individual thing. It is an empowering thing. And yet, everyone does it. Why is that? Something so ordinary can feel as freeing as an open road or a broad horizon.
I select a grade open the gas cap and begin filling. My mind fills with thoughts as mundane elevator music fights for my brain's recognition. The solitude is brief, twelve gallons, give or take. A cool breeze blows across my face and for a moment I close my eyes and imagine the simplicities of life. A familiar click and I hop back in my car, back to reality.

A New Leaf (it's autumn, forgive the pun)

2007-09-24T12:12:00.000-04:00

What the heck...because maybe someone might check out my blog I've decided to start posting again.

Lately I've been getting more interested in organic living, going green, free range, and all that jazz (as has much of America it seems). Little did I realize that my mom made steps in this direction even when I was a baby (using cloth diapers and such so as not to polute a land fill -yuck, but thanks mom).
I was raised to consider the importance of nature and our stewardship over the earth, but it was tangential in its impact and was so ingrained in me that I didn't think of it and, like many, I ceased to think of it.
In highschool it became an issue again. By living in Minnesota I was surrounded by lots of conscious nature-lovers and in some sense I even adopted a Scandinavian perspective of big 'N' nature. College caused me to start thinking more sacramentally about life in general and my junior year in Dr. Edward's Mod Civ class I was confronted with the book "Dominion" by Matthew Scully. I seriously considered becoming a vegetarian at that point and then chose a different route. Comparable to the attitude of the goat woman in Charles Frazier's "Cold Mountain" I realized that because of God's ordination it isn't wrong that we should eat living things, but it doesn't mean that it can be gone about haphazardly.
Stewardship doesn't mean an earth-subjecting free for all. And "well done My good and faithful servant" cannot mean only a single area of our lives. The point in sacramental living is that all our lives should be directed in praise and reverence for God and what He has ordained, realizing that the way we live is as important as the ends to which we live it.
(c.f. "Crunchy Cons" by Rod Dreher for more information)

A new month, why not a new entry

2007-04-12T14:41:00.000-04:00

It wouldn't be exactly accurate to say that the spring weather invigorates me. The birds singing in the trees in the morning invigorate me, but sometimes the incesant drizze just makes me think. Good things, bad things, hard things.
Life is fast approaching in one sense. But life is here too. I struggle a lot with Romanticism and lately its been rearing up again. The awful tendency to look around the bend in aprhension and anticipation, but lack any real contentment with my place here and now.
One of the reasons I find history frustrating and illusive is because we can never truly relive it. We can read about the cannons firing on Revolutionary battlefields. We may even see an excellent recreation of an historic room, just as the 19th century owner might have left it. But how much can we really live in the past? Not much. Nor should we. In my longings I look backwards forwards and up, but as Mary Poppins tells Jane Michael some people can't see past the end of their noses. Focusing too far away from the present can be a danger. We miss what's just past our noses.
God calls us to have our sight on eternity, but He does not call us to ignore those around us. In fact, it is just the opposite. "Whatever you do to the least of these you have done it to me."
The statue of liberty is an abstract. She can't really deal with the tired, poor, and hungry. We can. We must.
I'm just always stuck making the excuse: "how?"

Scope

2007-02-03T11:45:00.000-05:00

My interaction with people is strangely limited this semester. Keeping in mind the three quarters of the people who were here when I arrived are now graduated I suppose it is somewhat understandable. There is of course the comfort zone factor, but then also the fact that I'm just not that outgoing. I'd like to pretend that I am a gregarious sort of person - someone that everyone is happy to say they know. But I'm afraid that's not true. However, I would also like to say that those people that do know me are happy to say so.
I realize above all that I would rather be given only that amount of people in my immediate circle to whom I can be a real encouragement. I can't make a difference in everyone's life, but I'll settle for a few.

2007-01-23T19:35:00.000-05:00

G-d is good. I know this, believe this, and have daily testimony of this. If I didn't, days like these past few would be far less baraeable. To say I feel utterly directionless is perhaps too melodramatic and pathetic. I usually live my life with a comfortable degree of flexibility and c'est la vie attitude. Why then am I so desperately looking for structure? I believe it may be because of the impending descentigration of the college structure in my life. After this, everything that happens is purely of my own volition and in a sense my own creation. True I will hopefully have a job that dictates the manner in which I spend much of my time, but I have a choice of job. And everything else (that is leisure and life at large), while it seems sickeningly lonely at the moment, cannot be all bad. I could always try to live near friends or *gasp* make new ones. And lots of people have done it. The truth is that I hate learning lessons and the ones that are mysterious are sometimes the hardest to learn.

Results

2006-12-12T11:17:00.000-05:00

Over the past week, I've received an answer to the horrid misery I and fifteen other members of the cross-country team experienced the day after our Regional meet in November. To fully explain, I must recap.

It all began when we pulled up the Holiday Motel (not to be confused with an Inn by a similar, dare I add more reputable name). This was to be our pre-race lodging. Because our bus was leaving us for the evening we had to eat dinner at the bar and grill adjacent to the motel. Despite the humorous name of said bar and grill, I shall not share it as I might then be accused of libel or some such thing. Just think somewhere in between the Mos Eisley Cantina and 'frank's smoky and less than sanitary bar.'
I digress.
We got our baskets of food -complete with papers to absorb extra grease - and tentatively ate our less than ideal pre-race food. So, no big deal, we can still run. We had terrible races. Was the fatty food really that bad for us? We couldn't be sure. That is, we couldn't be sure until Sunday. Then it struck.
{enter the Norovirus}
Keeping in mind my less-than-doctor-like-sensitivities I'll spare the ugly details. Suffice to say that my body violently and urgently removed every bit of the virus it could in every way possible. I never want such an experience again.
It was some of the greatest bonding my team (and my suite in particular) ever experienced though. Nothing brings a team together like shared misery, ginger ale and saltines.

Some Delayed Thanksgiving Reflections

2006-12-09T18:07:00.000-05:00

This Thanksgiving was not my first away from home. Too many, in fact have been spent that way -the complications I suppose of establishing just one date when you may have approved "family get togethers" that makes other days spent with them seem "oridnary," lacking holiday quality because they haven't the title. I can honestly say that each Thanksgiving I've not been with my family I have missed them. And yet, each time the alternate experience was fully worthwhile.

This Thanksgiving I was at the Boy's and meeting his extended family. That was a delight and an adventure. In some respects his cousin, who dominates conversations, reminds me of my own unlce; both of whom do so in so cheerful and jocular a manner that it makes everyone feel they have voluntarily relegated themselves to listening.

My guy's uncle, having clasped my hand in greeting proceeded to give me a European style kiss on the cheek. Paired with his good-natured smile and engaging conversation it was surprising, but not unwelcome. We talked of educational phiosophy and I was thankful for my related course this semester that I might actually having something of interest to contribute. Later he recognized me as a fresh audience for a legendary family joke (that when mentioned elicited groans throughout the room).

People are fascinating even when one is not close to them. I was so engaged and distracted the whole day through that I didn't actually have time to know I missed my family until we were in the car driving back from the relative's house.
I adhere to my family's traditions, perhaps too strongly. I look on at other's as a curiousity, but never consider them quite right. Though I didn't exactly miss my family during the meal and conversation, I consciously knew it was not "my" type of Thanksgiving. It was almost as if I didn't realize it was Thanksgiving, then when I realized I had missed Thanksgiving with my family, I missed my family. Christmas will be a welcome change.

2006-12-07T13:51:00.000-05:00

Today I stumbled across this almost humourously comprehensive website delineating the finer elements of apple variety. It comes complete with descriptions, usage, and even a photo gallery.
Who knew that you could learn so much from the apple journal.

2006-12-01T08:43:00.000-05:00

Today it smells like worms. I know it's gross, but there's simply no getting around it. The day before yesterday: it rained. Yesterday: it rained. Today: it's raining. That gives plenty of time for all the creatures of the dirt to make there way to the sidewalk to (apologies to sensitive persons) die.
There is nothing particular glamourous or wretched, I suppose, about this sort of death for a worm. We, and I daresay they, hardly take it into account. I'm not going to launch into some zen-like tirade about how we ought to care more for our fellow creatures, but I will say that it puts the biblical passage of man's unredeemed being (likened unto a worm) into a new perspective. Just as we ignore the worms or count them an inconvenience and noxious odor, God could easily ignore us as such. And yet he cares for us an calls us His children and legitimate heirs. Amazing.

2006-11-16T15:55:00.000-05:00

Last night I went to a lecture of Christianity and Contraceptives. Curious topic I suppose.
The point of the lecture in general was not to make any conclusive arguments, but rather to present arguments and leave the listener in a state of pensive critical thinking. It certainly did that.
As of now, I stand with my original belief that there is nothing wrong with Christian couples using artificial means (so long as is doesn't destroy life such as some form of "morning after" pill) to prevent having children for a time. So long as the God given context of sexual relations is considered, that is to say, that it cannot be and should not be isolated from the aspect of procreation, it does not seem irresponsible nor wrong to "plan" a family. There are additional means of birth control such as so called "natural family planning" (which by the way could just as easily be used the other way round). I sometimes have difficulty in seeing the marked distinction.
The topic itself, as I mentioned, is curious, but not one wholly undiscussed in my circle of friends. The difficulty it seems to me arises from Christians taking their lead from the past or even current trends rather than seeking God's will and His purposes. I could potentially talk myself into a hole, but as I am willing to be wrong I don't see that as such a danger.

People shouldn't get married unless they are 'ready' to have kids. But who really is ready to have kids? And who is really ready for marriage for that matter? I am convinced that no one is truly prepared for either of these circumstances and it comes down to being responsible, making decisions, and ultimately seeking God in everything you do.
It is the same with birth control. It's quite possible there are right and wrong answers, but I don't know them and people must be ultimately subject to God and take the responsibility for their decisions.

2006-11-07T14:31:00.000-05:00

I've just finished reading chapter ten in William Kilpatrick's Why Johnny Can't Tell Right from Wrong. This particular chapter deals with music as a means of either promoting or inhibiting moral education. I was a little taken aback at first by the blatant attack, stating that rock music:
"ruins the imagination of young people and makes it very difficult for them to have a passionate relationship to the art and thought that are the substance of liberal education" pg. 176

Further consideration, along with the realization that Kilpatrick is most specifically attacking that sort of rock which is generally considered "hard rock" and intentionally plays to the rebellious tendencies of wayward and otherwise delinquint youth, caused me to agree with him more than I anticipated. Kilpatrick cites Irving Babbit who concludes that rock is similar in its striving and longing to Romanticism. The Romantic spirit "is fickle" and "always in search of new high." True hard rock then promotes a sense of insatiability and discontent, both of which are clearly contrary to Christian values of fulfillment.
Concerning Romanticism: I was, through my high school and early college days, quite an ardent supporter of passionate, idylic, and (now I realize) ignorant Romanticism. My idealistic tendencies urged me to see the best of every situation without attending to realistic concerns. Even in the matter of relationships I only half jokingly referred to my soon to appear Prince Charming who would sweep me off my feet in one fell love at first sight swoop. Romanticism of course involves far more than small 'r' romantic notions. Hope and love of beauty are Christian values. While Romanticism tends to desire to abscond with these, it throws ideals of human nature into the mix whereas Christianity reveals the truth of sin and reveals the only hope for humanity as redemtion through Christ. (Incidentally, Romanticism fully played out realizes its hopeless situation and ends ultimately in suicide with more comparison to nihilism than a glorious heroic end) The topic of Romanticism as it relates to faith, while worthy, constitutes a digression from the matter at hand. (For further reading concerning how Romanticism can in fact be the first step to Christian faith, see C.S. Lewis' Pilgrim's Regress)

In the realm of music, Romanticism shifts focus "from the work of art to the artist himself." This ultimately selfish pursuit of self and indulging emotion leads to a greater emphasis of a self-determined moral compass (which leads ultimately to the dead-end of apathetic Relativism).

I have always loved music, it was instilled in me from my own youth. But what sort of musical education did I receive as a child? I was raised until my early teens almost exclusively on classical, bluegrass/classic country, and a few select classic rock and oldies songs that my dad simply loved. The point is that my parents never allowed me to be entirely subject to the whims of morality characteristic of the entertainment industry. Our (my siblings and I) sense of morality was one that was discussed circuitously. My parents never said, "we're listening to Schubert because he is morally superior." It was simply "beautiful" music. We've since grown up to have similar, but also remarkably distinct tastes in music. Music was not a restricted realm (as Kilpatrick tends too much to recommend), but rather a wealth of beauty waiting to be discovered through careful consideration and critical determination of whether or not any given genre or artist was worth while given their message and intent.

Undoubtably the bad and base elements of culture must be properly rejected, but with discernment the good can be found.

2006-10-24T11:08:00.000-04:00

A far cry from ikea, I stumbled upon this scanidnavian design website and realized the unfortunate truth of my expensive tastes. Fjorn has hand woven blankets and table linens as well as knit sweaters and mittens.

The important things in life...

2006-09-19T11:08:00.000-04:00

Chapel this morning was surprisingly poignant.
A man who is a missionary from Namibia spoke concerning the essentials of truth in doctrine.
Christianity too often is presented as a panacea religion. This it is not.
We are called to serve G-d with all our heart, mind, and strength. We are not called to a life of ease nor should our goals be those things designed only to grant us such a life. Comfort and prosperity, however, are by no means sinful. They are blessings that ought to be duly regarded as such and in turn cause us to be thankful. But we ought never to forget that the assurace of eternal salvation outweighs any blessings or trials we experience on earth. It is difficult sometimes for me to remind myself of this. I may never be called to truly suffer in body for the faith. But even reminding myself that the blessing of salvation is greater than anything can be hard when I am distracted by earthly things. I just need to remember that G-d does not ultimately call us to seek happiness (joy, yes, but not happiness on earth), but rather endeavor to be holy as He is holy.
"In the world you have tribulation, but take courage: I have overcome the world." -John 16:33

2006-09-13T10:47:00.000-04:00

It's raining again. I walked through the art building yesterday and saw the telltale signs. A garden of colorful umbrelllas had sprouted in the front entry way. They opened up to allow their fresh dew to drip onto the gleaming white tile below. Suffice it to say, it was poetic weather at its best.

Up and running

2006-09-07T19:27:00.000-04:00

My long-awaited independent study has begun. The preliminary bibliography has been submitted and I now turn my attentions elsewhere. My first assignment will be somewhat tedious, though ultimately quite fascinating. The goal is to determine the chemical paint composition of Vermeer's unique palette and the pigments therein. Then I must analyze briefly and broadly some areas where such colors appear in the artist's works. No doubt I will touch on utramarine, vermillion, and ochre. But I hope to find information concerning greens and russet browns as well (some of my favorite tones). My excitement for the task far outweighs the burden of the work I know I will be putting into it. I will have some real artistic scholarship under my belt when I'm through and who knows, perhaps I may even be able to contribute something of worth.

I wish I were somewhere else

2006-09-05T14:23:00.000-04:00

It's just one of those days. They come to everyone, I'm sure. The kind of day where this world seems not enough. Where my placement in this world seems incorrect, an imperfect fit. It's all I can do to be content with where G-d has placed me. For all my dreaming, I could not construct a perfect life. It is only by His grace I construct anything at all.
I want to run temporarily away from life. There is not even anything dangerous or perilous compelling me - it is only my selfishness. I mistakenly apply the gifts of life to situations such as these. To sit in an engulfing chair with a full mug of steaming goodness would be delightful. And yet, knowing what I have to get done, I could not fully enjoy that pleasure just now.
Life doesn't get easier. I am convinced of this. Trials will always exist and rear their ugly head when I feel least able to fend them off. I, I, I. I, alone can do so little, can do nothing.

"From the end of the earth I call
to You when my heart is faint;
Lead me to the rock that is
higher than I" Ps. 61:2

oncoming autumn

2006-09-01T09:25:00.000-04:00

Autumn is a death of sorts. There's a line from a song that goes something like this: "show me death is beauty in the turning of the leaves" (Like Summer). I think that description is so apt. You cannot deny the fact of grace that makes even the death of the seasons beautiful, to some, the most beautiful of all.
Autumn is also the beginning of so much. Crisp weather, new boxes of crayons, woodsmoke in the air, and houses packed with relatives over the holidays. Not to mention sweaters and scarves and nights by the fire with a good book. Those attributes are undoubtably cliche, but who decided that cliches are always bad?
The coming of autumn always causes me to become pensive and yet hopeful. There's a long list of things to be done; a cheerful busying about. It's almost as if the year starts in autumn. It's a time to re-examine my life and to determine how best to live and act.
Whenever life becomes directional, I think of where it will lead. College classes lead to a yet unknown future at graduation. I have few clear desires directing my path. My wishes are more abstract. I want to have a house in the woods to enjoy the crisp weather and smell the woodsmoke and invite over relatives. And I want to share those pleasures. But somwhere in the mix, reality hits. I need a job to pay the bills and rent on an apartment that is more likely than not in some suburb or city with few immediate forests. I do not intend to sound glum, only to add a dash of realism and lower my cloud castle somewhat. And yet even in the unknown and oftentimes earthbound heaviness of reality, I am excited.
G-d is sovereign and though I struggle to discern direction, I am never alone, nor am I out of His plans. He has a plan. How could I help but be excited?

2006-08-22T23:25:00.000-04:00

Back in the saddle again. more to follow, but this week I'm basically sitting every second I have free from running and sit ups. Cross country camp strikes again.

the all encompassing summer post

2006-06-15T20:29:00.000-04:00

It's summer. I'm not on my computer. And I'm worring and resting and having an all around good time - at least that's the plan.
Translation:
I'm off of school for the summer. I have an internship that is going to be pretty awesome cataloguing an illustrator's collection. And I'm hoping to do somehiking and short term traveling and have people travel to me. Therefore, I am going to enjoy a summer that is virtually computer free and unless absolutely necessary I suggest any lonely creatures that have stumbled upon my blog do likewise. I'll be back in the fall hopefully with a new pocket full of adventures to be recorded.
Tchau!

2006-05-08T11:11:00.000-04:00

Happy V-E Day.

Percy and Pete

2006-04-29T12:34:00.000-04:00

Last night roomie and I got fish. Not to eat, but to own. We were at dessert theatre and each centerpiece had goldfish. So after the night's festivities we absconded with a bowl. We named them Percy and Pete. They're probably both girls for all we know. But they live in a cozy home together, just like roomie and me. But roomie and I probably won't be facing imminent flushing or be given away to strangers at the end of the year. Despite a filmy tank that needs cleaning and icky fish waste at the bottom I think I like the fellas and I'm sure they like us. Life could be worse than living on a sunny windowsill.

2006-04-26T12:08:00.000-04:00

The post seen here is a marvelous post in its simplicity and straightforward truth. The complexities of life, including children, life, and death come back to the essential element of faith.

Kahlil Gabran had another, perhaps less poignant saying, from The Prophet concerning passion and reason that I find particuarly compelling. In light of the fact that is it, for me, often a difficult matter to combine passion and reason. Plus I just love any reference to phoenixes.

“Your reason and your passion are the rudder and the sails of your seafaring soul. If either your sails or your rudder be broken, you can but toss and drift, or else be held at a standstill in mid-seas. For reason ruling alone is a force confining; and passion unattended is a flame that burns to its own destruction. Therefore let your soul exalt your reason to the height of passion, that it may sing; And let it direct your passion with reason, that your passion may live through its own daily resurrection and like the phoenix rise above its own ashes.” Kahlil Gabran

Friday night Mr. B took me out for some post-birthday celebration.

2006-04-22T09:14:00.000-04:00

Where we were going was a surprise and all I knew was to dress nicely. That sort of tipped me off, but I wanted to maintain the suspense so I refused to look at any city happenings that might have been posted online.
We started by heading to a wine and spirits shop (yay birthdays) and picked out a nice qualitatswein. Then is was down to Pittsburgh. Dinner plan 'A' fell through because of traffic.

So we ended up getting tickets for the symphony earlier than planned (suspicions proved correct) and stopping at Starbucks to kill an hour and escape the rain. Finally, the symphony. Holst's "The Planets" was playing and my excitement rose with every step on the marble stairs. Tickets in hand we wandered through the gleaming foyer, past the cheerful parties of politely chatting people.

It takes more than an atmosphere to create an aura of sophistication, though the immaculate rugs, enormous stairwells, and towering elegance of Heinz Halls’ various entrance lobbies certainly help. I have often known classical music to transform an ordinary room into something extraordinary, but seeing the daunting glamour of Heinz Hall it was apparent that the atmosphere of the building and the music played there created each other. The walls simply swallowed the music as they have done for years and it shone out from underneath the thick paint and gold leaf adornments, having joined with melodies of past concerts to create the unmistakable glow of the music hall.

The people who attend the symphony make it clear through their polite greetings and elegant manners that such an occasion is not an activity, like a movie or a baseball game: it is an event. It is an embodiment of sophisticated finery wholly enclosed in one evening. The gentleman sitting next to me was no exception to this rule; he was clearly a patron. It is "patron appreciation month" at the symphony and every seat purchased by a donar was laden with a single carnation bloom. At the end of the evening, the gentleman to my right gave a friendly (though not overly familiar) smile and extended the flower in my direction. Up to that point, this simple gesture entirely made my evening. He didn't even say a word, but with a grandfatherly sense of understanding, he knew that I, being a Romantic, would love to leave the symphony having been given a flower.

2006-04-15T19:03:00.000-04:00

I'm at the bro's and it is a much needed weekend and a break from school.
I've just returned from a nearly week long trip to Ashland Kentucky where I was on a mission trip. To describe everything that happened inside and out of me would take a rather long time therefore I'll just point out a few of the highlights. From Ashland Jacks to Potluck Heaven, it was a week full of lots of learning, joy, and eating. When you spend an extended amount of time in close quarters with people you get to see their good and bad and they see yours. What's amazing is that the good can so easily outweigh the bad if you just look for it. I saw Christ displayed in friends and strangers in ways I'd never expected. I also dealt with more PineSol than I ever have in my life, but the people I was with were all so cheerful that any work we undertook was a new opportunity to talk and laugh with each other. That may sounds trite, but my burden is light when I am among fellow laborers in Christ.

I think people (obviously apart from God) are the most important thing in the world. They are, after all, created in the image of God. Imago Dei is not to be taken lightly. It is the thing which gives man status in the world. Not to seem an ultra-humanist, but when you think about it that way, the idea of loving your neighbor becomes a more obivious progression of thought. You are to love God above all and secondly love those who bear His image. Granted there are many more important theological elements within that commandment, perhaps the most important of which is a proper application of loving others above yourself. It is so easy to love oneself. I am guilty as charged on that account. Ashland revealed much to me concerning my lack of selfless love. I cannot explain the full implications of selfless love, but my realization was a firm reminder that this life is fleeting and the time we have is not our own. God has numbered our days and, no longer being slaves to sin, we are slaves to righteousness. What a glorious bondage if only we could learn to embrace it whole-heartedly.

2006-04-04T16:45:00.000-04:00

Sunday was glorious. I was able to eat real food in a real house. On top of that I got to walk back from said house in the afternoon sunshine. Feeling nostalgic, I embraced the rest of the daylight in an afternoon of kite flying, accompanied by reading poetry and eating an apple. All in all, it seemed pretty perfect. Oddly enough, much like the Paradisio, it seems there's less to say about the good things.

That seems such a tragedy to me. So often we never forget to pray during trials, but elements of praise slip through the cracks as if their existence were somehow standard and deserved. Do we forget who it is that we worship? This is the same God in whose presence, it is said in the Psalms, "the mountains melted like wax." We ought to praise God everyday all day. Even supplications are done with a mentality of praise for we know that God is faithful to His people.
"The Lord reigns, let the earth rejoice" Ps. 97

2006-04-04T00:32:00.000-04:00

It's not impossible to smile at the end of an "interesting" evening if you're with people with whom it's worth it to smile.

my new door decoration

2006-03-29T14:13:00.000-05:00

Watch out furry friends. It's...

photo of the day

2006-03-25T16:24:00.000-05:00

because I'm feeling sappy.

2006-03-25T09:34:00.000-05:00

Yesterday roomie and I "made memories."
This involved getting about half a block from a gas station and running out of gas. Ok, no biggie, one of us will just run get a portable gas container and come back and fill it up. Not so. Apparently, since the last time either of us encountered one such gas can they've made them childproof, adult proof, and bear proof. Why it can't just be a simple stopper top I don't know. Luckily, not far off there was a construction site full of burly construction workers, one of whom must have enough of a Y-chromosome to be able to assist us. Off roomie went, gas can in hand. The helpful man who volunteered (much to our relief) also had trouble figuring out the contraption. He had enough brute strength on his behalf however that finally something was worked out. He treated us much as he would his own daughter (so he said), complete with the censure, "Do have money?...Then you shouldn't ever run out of gas."
I think we both felt like saying, "yes dad."
So, as to avoid the embarassement of the evil gas can, I suggest that if you have money, "you shouldn't ever run out of gas."

classic cool guy

2006-03-17T13:57:00.000-05:00

I was thinking about childhood yesterday. It was because of one of those fowarded email surveys about your life in a nutshell. Sometimes they're just fun. But they can also serve to remind you of things you might have misplaced in your memory. For instance, vanilla ice cream really is the best.
But most particularly (to get back to my introduction), the sorts of movies we watched were, I suppose, less than tradtional children's selections. I never realized until I got older that not everyone grew up on Treasure Island, Captain Blood, and of course, The Great Escape. I can honestly say that in the first ten years of my life, Steve McQueen was on my list of coolest people. I can also unabashedly state that to this day the three above movies are among my favorites. I was always happiest for Danny, but Capt. Hilts was the best. Let's face it, sometimes you just need some Steve McQueen.

2006-03-15T18:06:00.000-05:00

Today I have a virus. Strictly speaking, I've had it for several days, but today its official title was realized. A blessing in disguise, however, it gives me a little time for thought and forced rest.
While I'm doddling...Happy Birthday (you know who you are).

Feelin' the burn

2006-03-08T19:50:00.000-05:00

Tonight I started pilates. I know. I thought so too -pilates?! You must be joking. While I'll admit that my previous experience with personal trainers and yogis left something to be desired, I have always had a strange enticing desire to engage in controlled exercise. So, I put on my stretchy pants and trudged over to the room with the big mirror (it reminds me of my ballet days) and listened to a toned young lady with a calming voice telling me that that dull ache of lactic acid will go away (just three more...sets).
Cross-country's been over for months. It's about time to whip myself into (according to my roomie) "better shape". And who knows, maybe I'll end up like this guy.

planning ahead

2006-03-02T15:11:00.000-05:00

My brother started getting on my case today. Apparently I'm supposed to do something grand with my summer. He has good intentions for being so insitent so I guess it doesn't bother me, but I sometimes like to entertain the idea of quiet life: training, art class, travel, camping, some random bacon-brining job on the side - that sounds like a pretty good summer to me.
But I never was very good at planning ahead. When I get my heart really set on something, it usually ends up falling through and leaving me in disappointment. Sometimes it just makes me plain scared to try. I know I need to. I need to reach and stretch and go out of my comfort zone. That zone never seemed so small before. I do feel my priorities have changed somewhat, but I don't know how much of that encroaches on my thoughts as just an excuse rather than a conviction. If it is the former then I know it is wrong.
This would all be easier if I had some clear idea of what I wanted to do, something to passionate for. For that I pray.
I must remember, though, to seek first the Kingdom of G-d and not to worry. Thankfully I can't mess anything up so far as to go entirely outside of the plan He has for me.

The serious things bring the most joy

2006-02-25T15:14:00.000-05:00

My bro is incredible. The compassion and strength that he shows are his lights and he is not hiding them under a basket (Matthew 5:16). One of the only things that makes me truly cry is when someone's faith is made undeniably apparent. It is not just because of the strength of their faith, but because of the elements of Chr-st that you can see in them. G-d blesses us in ways that we cannot forsee and more greatly than we can conceive. I am thankful for what I see.

Last night I saw End of the Spear and the part that caused me to be overwhelmed with emotion was not the aspects of death or loss, but the unwavering elements of faith. Granted, the dramatized version of the story is not wholly true, but the words of the father to his son before his death stuck with me. When pressed by his son whether or not the party would use their guns against the Waodani (the violent Amazonian tribe on whom the missionaries were targeting their efforts) the father had a resolute reply. He said, "We can't shoot them because they're not ready for heaven. We are." We ought to be ready for heaven. We ought always to be ready for heaven, as no one knows the day or hour of Chr-st's second coming.

We are not lights in our own right. We are only such by the grace of G-d. Therefore it isn't something that we may boast about. But because G-d has given us this grace, we cannot help but let it shine. We should be lights and recognize also that of our fellow believers. It is all from G-d and leads to our glorifying Our Father in heaven.